Law

Standing in these corridors,
I take a deep breath
Feeling every thought on my skin…
And I realize you are all here
Surrounding me
I am never alone in these halls
Red spilled and swallowed right back
And spit out of a mouth which
Never knows how to give a proper answer.

Advertisements

time out

i should explain
the reason why i’ve been
looking empty lately
it’s the least i can do

i love you
you know that
and i know that you love me too
and i understand why you would
not want to risk anything

however
it doesn’t hurt less
because to me it felt
like you said you would
not even try to make
this thing between us
work

and i’m unexperienced
naive and stupid
and somehow i believed – i hoped
– you would not think this way
but you did
and i bled
and the red stains the carpet
even now.

i guess something broke in me
the illusion died
the smile faded
i am never able to pretend
everything is 100%
fine

i was unfair
we’re still in the beginning
somehow i forgot that
so i’m sorry i dumped so many expectations
on top of you

but i won’t apologize
for the crazy thoughts
that went through my head
they are mine
the feelings
everything
has my name written all over it
so i won’t say i’m sorry for that.

so right now i just need some time
to organize what i’m feeling
to come to terms with reality
i don’t want to talk about it now
i’m still too hurt for that

so just give me time
and i’ll come back.

Try to cage me and I’ll fly even farther

I’m sorry if my words hurt you. But I know that you know they have at least some truth in them. You give me love and care. But you don’t give me freedom. Freedom to make my own choices. Freedom to have experiences. Freedom to talk to you. When I try to break free, you just give me that sarcastic smile and reinforce the shackles that imprison me to you. I can’t be what I really want to be because you make me feel like I have something to prove. So, I try to live by your standards, but I’m not happy. If I could be anywhere else but here, I would be. You don’t see what this is doing to me. I’m young, but I feel old, seeing the years slip by through my fingers without being able to do anything about it.

You don’t see me breaking.

And that’s why you’ll never see me leaving.

Near the end

I look back at the road in my chase
The wind blows strongly against my face
Every step was hard and painful,
But the surprises were worth the effort…
There are still some steps left,
But I can take a moment to rest,
To observe the way I’ve been going
And admire how much I’ve been growing.

Always one foot in front of the other…

Soon I’ll have to look to the front
And turn my back to the past behind.
So there is nothing for me but to go on,
To finish this road I’ll keep trying.

Close my eyes
Hush now
Everything has stopped somehow

Be still and will
Your mind to travel back

Remember the time
When we were fine
When every dream came true

When our fears were not so strong
When our eyes
Still filled with song…

I walk around the room
And I can see them clearly
All the people all the dreams
And all the pain are blurring
Every single step I’ve taken
Suddenly burning
With fire like a ruby
Everything is turning

Maybe I was quiet and shy
And feared a lot of things
But I am going to share and
Make them see my dreams
Cause all the pieces fit like a puzzle
And I’m done trying not to scream
At every single injustice I can see on the screen

Stop time
Just for a minute
Let them shine
The past and the riddles
Long solved and gone

May we revel
In those victories

Our paths are in the making
And we can’t see where they are ending
But we can control the way they’re taking
Us to where we have to start breaking
The walls that have been chasing
Us from the beginning.